Luke Skywalker is earnest, fiercely serious and seems to lack the sense of humor of, say, Han Solo.

But the force behind Skywalker, actor Mark Hamill, is as funny as Jabba the Hutt is fat.

Hamill’s mark on comedy is in his writings to fans on old Star Wars trading cards. He likes to quickly craft a funny sentence to go with the scene on the card, followed by an artfully penned signature.

In a card titled The Search for Vader, Hamill writes: “This Vader guy is a loser . . . Hope he doesn’t have kids!”

Apple signed a lease for 300,000 square feet of office space in San Jose last month, but the company might be eyeing a bigger expansion in the city, according to a new report that Apple just purchased a massive development site in North San Jose.

In a deal worth more than $138 million, Apple has purchased 43 acres of land at 2347 North First St., according to documents obtained by the Silicon Valley Business Journal. Apple has yet to announce its plans for the property, but it will be the company’s first significant presence into San Jose in decades.

Here’s a map of the land Apple just bought:

Apple has touted the Mac’s resistance to viruses for decades as a selling point over Windows PCs, but a team of researchers have created a new firmware worm for Mac that might just make you want to go back to doing work on good old pencil and paper.

Two white-hat hackers discovered that several vulnerabilities affecting PC makers can also bypass Apple’s renowned security to wreak havoc on Mac firmware. The two created a proof-of-concept of the worm called Thunderstrike 2 that allows firmware attacks to be spread automatically from Mac to Mac. Devices don’t even need to be networked for the worm to spread, and once it’s infected your machine the only way to remove it is to open up your Mac and manually reflash the chip.

Here’s a preview of Thunderstrike 2 in action:

The web is a weird and wonderful place that’s also crawling with sneaks out to snatch your data. One of the best ways to keep those creeps at bay is to encrypt your browsing activity, and that’s exactly what TigerVPN does. Right now a lifetime subscription to TigerVPN is just $29, a whopping 96% off the regular price.

While preparing to move to another city, I recently came across my very first car charger. It was the size of a brick, about as heavy, and in the middle of it was a fuse. With it, me and my ’98 Malibu were unstoppable – unless, of course, the fuse blew.

So it is with amazement and amusement I write about a product that claims to be the world’s smallest and most powerful car charger. The reVOLT and reVOLT Dual by SCOSCHE offers 12 watts of power sitting flush in your car’s power socket.

The absolute worst part of buying an iPhone every year is having to deal with AT&T and Verizon in order to qualify for Apple’s latest device. That could soon be a thing of the past, though, as Apple is looking to launch its own wireless network so users wouldn’t have to deal with traditional carriers any longer.

Xiaomi is once again China’s top smartphone firm, pushing Apple down to third place despite its immensely strong quarter, and Samsung to either fourth or fifth position.

Huawei and Vivo rounded out the top five, in second and fourth/fifth place respectively.

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There are fertility deities, dances, stones, herbs and masks. Every culture has rites and rituals that try to improve the chances of a woman getting pregnant.

Tech culture, too, tries to influence the forces of fertility with gadgets and smartphone apps to create ovulation calculators, period calendars and temperature trackers. But you still need the discipline of consistent record keeping for them to work.

The startup company, YONO Labs, has developed an ear piece that records BBT, Basal Body Temperature, and other body and hormonal symptoms while a woman sleeps. When she wakes, the device gets docked and the data gets stored in an iOS or Android app for your smartphone.

It may not be quite the 8K iMac rumored earlier this summer, but Apple is set to refresh its iMac lineup this quarter with faster processors and improved displays, according to ever-reliable KGI Securities analyst Ming-Chi Kuo.

A brain-training iOS game can reportedly help improve the memory of patients with schizophrenia, thereby letting them lead more independent lives.

We already know that, as is usual for incremental iPhone “s” releases, the iPhone 6s and 6s Plus won’t differ too much from the iPhone 6 or 6 Plus in terms of external design.

However, according to some new CAD design renders from the usually-reliable @OnLeaks, the next-generation iPhone is set to be a little thicker than the current model handsets.

The iPhone 6s will measure 7.1mm thick — 0.2mm thicker than the iPhone 6 — while the iPhone 6s Plus will be 7.mm thick, compared to the 7.1mm iPhone 6 Plus.

The iPhone may not yet sport an ultra-tough sapphire display, but don’t think Apple’s handsets are by any means delicate.

A 74-year-old Texas businessman recently expressed his amazement after his iPhone fell 9,300 feet during a flight from Houston — and miraculously survived.

Apple Music may have come under fire from big-name Apple commentators but you can’t say that the service hasn’t delivered when it comes to artist exclusives.

Over the weekend, Dr. Dre announced on his Beats 1 show The Pharmacy what, for long-time hip-hop fans, may be the most exciting exclusive of all: His first album since 1999’s The Chronic 2001 is debuting on Apple Music and iTunes this Friday.

Siri is looking for a way to stop you ever having to listen to your voicemails again, according to a new report.

Apple is reportedly testing a new smart voicemail feature which, among other innovations, would allow Siri to answer your calls and then transcribe the voicemails as text messages.

Attention: jailbreakers and would-be jailbreakers!

TaiG, the Chinese jailbreaking team that has been thanked in Apple patch notes for exposing iOS vulnerabilities, has just released a new jailbreak tool for Mac that will allow you to run unsigned code on any iOS 8.4 device. Hurrah!

GeekBar – a generally reliable Chinese site behind a series of schematic and parts leaks about upcoming Apple releases – has published new images of what they claim is a fully-assembled display for the iPhone 6s.

Let’s face it – your stock, rubberized Lightning cable often comes up short and just doesn’t last very long. Whatever the gripe, the durable, extra-long and versatile alternatives in this roundup will meet your mobile-charging needs.

We have the technology. We can make the Cult of Mac website better than it was. Better, stronger, faster.

We can and we did (and it didn’t cost us $6 million, either). In this week’s issue of Cult of Mac Magazine for iPhone and iPad, you’ll get the scoop on our website’s redesign, plus updates on Apple TV, opinions on Apple Watch and some totally disarming selfies.

It’s the weekend, which means it’s time for Cult of Mac to run down the week’s best apps. From guerrilla filmmaking to guerrilla warfare, and silent messaging apps to RSS readers, we’ve got something for everyone.

Check out our picks below:

This week: why we might be in for big iPad upgrades this year; our expectations for the iPhone 6C; the one feature we hope iPhone 6S will get (but probably won’t); Woz is worried about Skynet again; and… is Apple building a machine for time travel? You’ll have to press play to find out…

Our thanks to HipChat for supporting this episode. HipChat’s team communication app helps all teams work together more effectively, and gets you the information you need faster than email. Get HipChat Plus free for 90 days at hipchat.com/cultofmac.

Show notes ahead, and they’re excellent.

This week’s soon-to-end deals have got something for everybody. Whether you want to tell animated stories, guard your online and physical wallets, or keep your groove going at the gym, these are all offers worth jumping on before it’s too late.

We’ve seen before that changing from Chrome to Safari can make a big difference on your Mac’s battery life.

But if you haven’t switched from Chrome or Firefox to Safari yet, this fact might change your mind: If you’re a MacBook user, you’re losing an average of one hour of total battery life by using anything but Safari.

Looking for a fun weekend project? Got 36 iMac boxes lying around? Make yourself an iMac hamster wheel.

Using a running app to log your workouts is a great way to track your progress and stay motivated. But have you considered who actually owns the workout data you are logging?

If you ever decide to switch apps, you might be in for a surprise. While some services, like Strava, make it easy to transfer your data, with others it can be difficult or even impossible.