After the rumblings and grumblings that we’ll get our first look at the Apple Watch 2 in as soon as three months, the Internet is ablaze with all of the great features the update “should” have. But let’s not go overboard, here, because not all of these suggestions would make the new wearable better.

We aren’t talking about Android compatibility, complete independence from its paired phone, or a better battery life; we’d welcome any of those updates in a second. But we couldn’t really see a need or want for a few of the rumored/desired new features, regardless of how crazy awesome they might seem at first.

A recent weird patent filing suggested Apple might be making a color 3-D printer. Now, the best Apple concept designer in the business, Martin Hajek, has come along and imagined the device in a set of beautiful renderings.

The developers of the Poison Maps app figured out a new way to implement 3D Touch that goes above and beyond what we’re used to seeing. They use two patent-pending gestures called “context zooming” and “context panning.” The first lets you quickly see the surrounding area of a particular location you’re zoomed in on without leaving that location, while the latter lets you move around in the surroundings and effortlessly focus in on somewhere new.

These gestures work using long presses. Since 3D Touch can sense varying amounts of force, Poison Apps cleverly uses the technology to adjust the zoom based on how hard you press.

Apple has a range of different Apple Watch straps available — but, aside from letting you pick the perfect strap to suit the rest of your attire, they all serve exactly the same function: keeping Apple’s debut wearable safely strapped to your wrist.

That may change in future iterations of the Apple Watch, with a new patent application published today describing how future Watch straps (or straps for other Apple devices) may include flexible displays woven into the material, offering another way of presenting user messages or notifications.

Apple hasn’t released a new printer since the heady days of the LaserWriter 8500 in 1997, but a new patent application suggests the company is working on a new printer — and it’s no ordinary one, either.

Published today under the name “Method and apparatus for three dimensional printing of colored objects,” the patent application describes a 3-D printer capable of not only printing amazing three-dimensional structures, but doing so in multiple colors.

A tongue-in-cheek (we assume) iPhone 7 concept video shows a feature that may be too awesome to ever actually exist.

YouTube user Sonitdac has discovered a way to keep the sure-to-be-expensive device safe from even the clumsiest of owners. They call it the “Parachute System,” and we really wish it were real. Not because it would be useful or practical but because it would be a ton of fun to play with.

Check it out in computer-generated action below.

The Apple-watching world just about blew a gasket when the Apple Pencil was first announced for the iPad, given Steve Jobs’ famous assessment that, “If you see a stylus, [Apple engineers] blew it!”

With that in mind, how would people react if the next iPhone went again Jobs’ wishes by taking a note out of BlackBerry’s playbook and included a physical keyboard as part of the handset? Not too well, we’re guessing, but you can make up your own mind about whether or not it would be a good thing or not by checking out the below concept video.

(Hint: it isn’t a good thing.)

What with it being winter and all, it would be great if Apple embraced the concept of letting people use iPhones while wearing regular gloves — something already offered by manufacturers such as Samsung.

Well, according to a patent application published today, we may not be waiting too much longer because Apple has invented something called “Glove Touch Detection.” The patent would allow Apple touchscreen to work in situations where it is separated from a finger by a barrier, such as a glove.

You know the way that Apple’s heroically struggling to build a new “spaceship” HQ capable of housing its army of brilliant worker ants who design the iPhone? Well, Samsung has an easier solution for its phone division: just fire a load of people.

New statistics published courtesy of Korea’s Financial Supervisory Service underline the degree to which Samsung’s smartphone business is struggling — with 5,000 employees booted out of the door over the past year, while 30 percent of execs are expected to follow them in the next month.

Apple’s always on the lookout for ways to improve the resiliency of its devices. For this reason, the U.S. Patent and Trademarks Office today published a new patent application from the company — calling for retractable drop-proof bumpers to be built into future iPhone housing, capable of doubling as a flotation device in case your handset accidentally lands in water.