This is not an Onion article, though you may have been fooled into thinking that given the preposterous headline.

NBA forward Matt Bonner has won two championship rings with the San Antonio Spurs, but after suffering his worst shooting percentage since his rookie season, the 35-year old his placing all the blame on Apple.

In a recent interview the basketball player revealed that he believes the iPhone 6’s larger screen contributed to his poor shooting performance, and gave him a season-ending injury in the form of a serious case of tennis elbow.

Microsoft has been killing it on iOS with its lineup of premium productivity apps. Now the company is trying to make organizing group outings a lot more fun with is new app Tossup from the Microsoft Garage.

Out today on both iOS and Android, Tossup allows large groups of friends and family to make decisions on things like where to eat, what movie to see, or who should be invited.

Here’s a demo of how it works:

The Apple Watch isn’t completely waterproof, so it makes sense that you won’t find a swimming option in the Workouts app. But that hasn’t stopped one development team from building their own way to track aquatic exercises on the wearable.

Active in Time has ported its own Pebble swimming app over to Apple’s smartwatch, and it tested its functionality (and the Apple Watch’s water resistance) with four lengths in an Olympic swimming pool. You can see the results in the video below.

My biggest gripe with Instagram is the app takes my big beautiful pictures and compresses them down to a low 640×640 resolution. It looks like the company is preparing to change that in near future though, by now storing images in a higher 1080 x 1080 size.

Amazon is getting more serious about taking a piece of the cloud storage action. Over the holiday weekend, the company released its Amazon Cloud Drive app for iOS, letting you finally access your files in Amazon’s cloud from your iPhone or iPad.

The app competes with the likes of Dropbox by enabling you to view your files anywhere, but falls short in a number of key areas.

Whether you’ve got them jotted down on a yellow notepad, in a document file, or scrawled on a stack of napkins hidden in your mattress, you’ve got to have a way keeping your passwords, financial info and other sensitive data secure and accessible when it’s needed. SplashID Pro’s Lifetime Plan gathers all those errant bits of info, puts them in one place, locks them up and hands you the only key.

Every summer Oreo comes out with a crazy new limited edition cookie to get you to stuff your face with more delicious cream filling. This year’s no different except instead of using watermelon, birthday cake, or lemon creme filling to tempt you, the company has taken a bite out of Apple’s playbook by making the Oreo impossibly thin.

Recording a rap album is tough, expensive work. Sure, you can bust out a crappy demo on computer if you can’t afford studio sessions, but when Brooklyn rapper Prince Harvey’s laptop got stolen, he found the next best thing to busting out beats at the library: The Apple Store in SoHo.

Apple tends to focus on internal components rather than external changes when it comes to its incremental “s” releases.

However according to a new leaked schematic, this year the company might think a bit different — with a slightly redesigned iPhone body that, surprisingly enough, could turn out to be marginally thicker than last year’s model.

Apple is predicting big things for its next-generation iPhone 6s — and for Apple’s manufacturers, big orders means hiring a big workforce to deal with it.

A new report today claims that Protek, a Pegatron subsidiary based in eastern China, is hiring 40,000 additional workers to cope with the iPhone 6s manufacturing it’s scheduled to start work on next month.

With just two full months to go until the iPhone 6s and 6s Plus are officially unveiled, a Chinese gadget blog has allegedly revealed the launch dates of both the iPhone 6s and 6s Plus — courtesy of sources inside the Foxconn supply chain.

The Chinese iPhone market is exploding, but perhaps a bit too literally for one Hong Kong woman, who claims that her 128GB iPhone 6 Plus exploded while being charged — not only separating the screen from the handset, but significantly melting the back cover.

Get in on some of the best offers at Cult of Mac Deals this week, with more than a day’s worth of tech business lessons, a lifetime subscription to Penzu’s digital journal, a battery-powered AC outlet/USB charger, and more.

Spring has left the building and these amazing deals are about to do the same, so jump on your last chance to sweep up the Spring Clean Mac Bundle, PhoneClean iOS Cleaner, and more.

If you bought an Apple Watch hoping it would help you get fit, but you haven’t been on your first run yet, maybe you need of a little more encouragement. So here’s some advice from a reformed couch potato.

The first workout is the hardest. It gets progressively easier and more rewarding from there. You just need to know how to get started.

Did you completely forget about Samsung Pay? Well, it’s still kicking. After a significant delay, the official launch is coming in a couple of months and Samsung is allegedly wrapping up tests to ensure it works properly.

Samsung is testing its Apple Pay competitor with eight different card companies in South Korea and is set to go live there as well as in the United States this September.

This week was all about the launch of the surprisingly fantastic Apple Music streaming service and the Beats 1 24/7 radio station here at Cult of Mac, and we’ve pulled all the cool info you’ll want about these two new Apple services into one delightful Cult of Mac Magazine issue.

Of course, we’ve got our first hands-on impressions of Apple Music and Beats 1, how Twitter and early reviews praised the service (and said goodbye to Spotify), all the details on albums you won’t find anywhere else, and a great tutorial on how to record the live Beats 1 audio stream right on your Mac.

Let’s get started, then, shall we? You can download and subscribe right here, too.

Beats 1 already boasts a superstar cast of DJ’s but they’re about to get a new pair of hosts in the form of rap group, Run the Jewels.

Killer Mike and El-P are set to take over Beats 1 every Friday at 6PM PT for their very own show called “WRTJ.” The show will follow the duo as they complete the Run the Jewel world tour and talk about music, as well as the merits of unicorns and dragons.

Check out the teaser El-P published today:

In 1987, Apple created a video set in 1997 that was all about how much better the world was with all of the amazing Apple products the company was going to create. Almost 20 years later, some of the predictions in this ’80s-tastic fantasy film are true, and some are laughably (and thankfully) absent from current hardware.

Check out the video below, but brace yourself for some really bad jokes.

No, you won’t lose all your DRM-free iTunes music. At least, not without deleting your actual files and not having a backup. Apple isn’t adding DRM to your iTunes files, either.

The reality here is that Apple will not automatically remove any iTunes music files you own on your computer and replace it with a digital rights managed (DRM) file.

However, the convergence of iTunes Match, Apple Music, and the new iCloud Music Library can be confusing, and there is a small potential to re-download files you’ve deleted from your Mac as DRM-protected Apple Music files.

Luckily, the folks at iMore have a pretty fantastic, clear explanation of what’s going down here, and a pretty neat way to check and see which of your music files have been matched, uploaded, or purchased. Even John Gruber linked to it, so you know it’s good.

Taylor Swift’s bold rant against Apple over royalties continues to echo in the ears of photographers.

A quick recap . . . Swift used her Tumblr page to chide Apple for initially not paying musicians during the trial period of the new Apple Music. Then a music photographer in England called her a hypocrite because the contract her people force editorial photographers to sign before shows says Swift has the right to use those photos for free to promote her brand.

Apple backed down, but the good publicity-bad publicity for Swift has photographers and photo editors taking second looks at the contracts of other musical acts.

Apple Music probably couldn’t have gotten off to a much better start. Following its launch on Tuesday, the service has been widely praised by fans and critics for its user experience and terrific Beats 1 radio — but what’s next for Apple and its Beats team?

Could the Cupertino company launch its very own music label? It has the talent, it has the resources, and it has already revolutionized the music industry once before. But does the move make sense?

Join us as we discuss that very question in this week’s Friday Night Fight between Cult of Android and Cult of Mac.

Beats 1 is live 24 hours a day, seven days a week, and it’s a fantastic way to get your dose of what’s happening right now in urban music.

Problem is, just like the terrestrial radio that it uses as its model, Beats 1 doesn’t have an archived recording of its shows. If you want to hear a specific DJ or interview, you have to tune in.

There are ways, however, of recording the audio stream with varying degrees of “free” and “easy.” Two of them involve some technical know how while the third will require you to drop some cash. Check it out.

Former Apple CEO John Sculley dropped some interesting new tidbits about Apple’s history in a recent interview. He said that all the way back in 1984, Jobs was dreaming up the idea of a “Mac phone.”

This “Mac phone” would be a desktop device that acted as a phone, but ran a version of the Mac’s software.