Valentine’s Day is supposed to be about connection. But every year, candlelit dinners across the country glow less from romance and more from the light of an iPhone screen. There’s even a word for it: “phubbing” — snubbing someone in favor of your phone.
If there’s one night when iPhone users absolutely must resist the reflex to check notifications or Instagram, it’s February 14.
Don’t let your iPhone ruin Valentine’s Day
I get it — Apple makes the most compelling tech on the planet. The iPhone is beautiful, endlessly capable, and designed to keep us entertained. That’s the problem.
The same device that lets you capture a perfect portrait in Night mode also pulls your attention away from the person sitting across from you. The one whose Valentine’s Day you’re ruining by phubbing them.
A quick glance at the Messages app turns into a scroll through Instagram. A buzz from a group chat becomes five minutes lost to headlines, sports scores or work email. Meanwhile, your partner is left competing with a slab of glass and aluminum — and losing.
Cupid called. He said to stop phubbing the person you love.
It’s ironic — the iPhone is packed with features meant to enhance relationships. Shared photo libraries, FaceTime, location sharing, collaborative playlists and more are all built around connection.
But those tools only matter if we know when to put down the iPhone. On Valentine’s Day, your partner should not need to compete with notifications or ask, “Are you listening?” It certainly shouldn’t involve one person stopping midsentence while the other says, “Sorry, just one second.”
The solution isn’t radical: Stop phubbing. Use Focus modes. Turn on Do Not Disturb. Flip the phone face down. Better yet, leave it in a pocket or bag during dinner.
Share Valentine’s Day with the person you love
None of this is anti-iPhone. It’s pro-presence. The best moments of the evening won’t come from a perfectly filtered photo or a cleverly worded post. They’ll come from eye contact, shared laughter and uninterrupted conversation.
Your iPhone will still be there after dessert. That message can wait. The world will survive without you for a few hours.
The person across from you at that candlelit, romantic dinner deserves your undivided attention. Don’t make them compete with your iPhone — you’re the one who’ll lose.
Thanks to Casely for the suggestion.
Ed Hardy has been writing full-time about tech for 25 years, and using it for much longer than that. His intro to Apple was a Macintosh Classic II (which he still has), but now he uses a 13-inch iPad Pro as his primary computer. He’s written for NotebookReview, TabletPCReview, and Brighthand, as well as other sites.
