When you’re ranting about Apple and its products, don’t forget to breathe.
One incredibly angry man learned that crucial lesson the hard way: His profanity-laden diatribe about the Apple Watch ended when he broke into a coughing fit. You can see the whole NSFW rant and its shocking twist ending below.
LiveLeak.com – Fat Four Eyed Angry Fucktard Almost Coughs To Death Ranting About The Apple Watch
“Who in their right mind would fucking wear a goddamn watch to answer the goddamn phone with?” the screed begins. “Or to download a goddamn app? Are you fucking kidding me?”
This continues for almost a minute and a half before coming to its violent end.
“I gotta calm down before I have a heart attack,” the anonymous ranter says. And then he finishes by chucking a few more F-bombs Apple’s way like a pro.
Vociferous hatred and trolling are one of the Internet’s most hallowed and long-standing traditions, and it’s impossible to tell whether this is genuine anger or a YouTuber playing a persona for clicks. We all fell for that “angry German kid” destroying his computer for not World of Warcraft-ing fast enough, and that video was staged as could be.
Regardless, the strategy obviously works because we’re talking about this guy right now.
The Internet loves yelling about what it hates at least as much as it enjoys squealing about what today’s “best thing ever” is, and both positions meet strong resistance. When something bad or embarrassing happens to a troll but they still get their trolls in, like we see in this video, everybody’s happy.
Via:Reddit
Evan Killham is a freelance writer who lives in Nebraska and isn’t interested in football, so he has plenty of time to play and think about video games. He has written for Bitmob and GamesBeat and sometimes, he even goes outside. But not too often because he’s heard there are bees out there. Occasionally, companies send free units for review. Evan subscribes to Cult of Mac’s Reviews Policy and also does not keep the items he receives for possible coverage.
45 responses to “See an Apple Watch hater nearly choke to death mid-rant (NSFW)”
Why would you give this video any attention.
I’m sorry, but this guys demeanor, physical condition, grooming, fashion sense and extraordinary “eloquence” bespeaks total low class ignorance. I wouldn’t have this loser slob haul away my trash, let alone follow his technology “reviews”.
“Thor’s giant schlong…” was a news story on Cult of Mac about 18 days ago. Thor’s schlong.
How the hell do you expect this NOT to be a story on this site?
CoM the place for Apple tech reviews, Best apps, CultCast y’all and nearly dying angry reviewists (breathe)…I LOVE IT!
He probably wears a fedora and complains about being friendzoned.
What a loser living his very own miserable life.
That explains a lot. Now when I read Apple hatin’ comments, I have a face to go with the hate.
Can’t afford a shirt, let alone the disposable income needed for an Apple Watch. Fat bitch….
What an idiot. Like anyone is forcing him to buy it.
What planet did this disgusting loser mutant come from? Do you think he ever gets his fat naked ass off the chair in his parents basement? I think he’s pissed off because Apple doesn’t make a watch band big enough for that ham hock he calls a wrist.
The Fat Ass Edition will be released this fall. The heart rate monitor takes your heart rate then opens maps and directs you to the nearest coronary unit.
It makes me so happy to know that some idiot nearly choked himself because of Apple.
Thanks for sharing regardless of what others say I found this funny!
Needs to stop smoking weed and eating his house.
This is exactly how I imagine most Apple haters looking. The Mountain Dew sipping, pseudo-macho neck-beard.
I love this guy! I died when he started choking on his own
Vomit.
Yeah, they probably would have to make an extra large sized watch/watch band called the “Damn” size.
This behemoth is upset with Apple because he bought some of their products only to discover product they werent Apple flavoured!
He was probably coughing up the iMac he ate when he was having that rant!
LOL…I honestly don’t think this guy has ever eaten an apple flavored anything, let alone an apple! He was chocking on an iMac and Cheese.
Just jolly ranchers hahaha
The gasbag probably pushed some poop nuggets out during that session. I wouldn’t be surprised if he also pushed it mixed with his poop cheese. He probably doesn’t even know he did that since he’s used to being sweaty and stinky down there 24/7! lol
Wonder if people did this for the original mobile phone.
I don’t think he’s moved since!
I think it’s just a phase he’s going through. Fortunately for everyone the imminent heart attack in the near future will see that phase come to an end. I actually feel more sorry for the soft drink companies cos their profit will dry up, and their shares plummet, once he has parted this world and ironically Apple’s shares will still continue to rise…
I would love to hear his reasons for why he hates Apple so much…
Probably because it’s not the kind that goes in pie.
LOL a fat, ugly, unintelligent nit wit sitting in a barcalounger doubtless in the trailer park in “Sordid Lives” who never met a potato chip he didn’t like….surely Apple’s core audience NOT. I wonder if Tim is watching this while streaking across the world in his private jet.
So your saying he’s got wooden legs sleeping with his ex-wife’s mother? Lordy! And I had to pick this day to stop smoking.
If this guy were wearing an Apple watch, given it’s positioning as a fashion item, I’d return mine and put my Dunhill back on.
Pot meet kettle.
That’s weird, as I had always bought into the stereotype that retarded people were sweet and happy. Live and learn!
It seems to me that there is such an trend on the social media that people demonize Apple to demonstrate their intellectual competence (or incompetence). But what the point of this? You don’t like it and it is fine. But doing the same shit as the dude in this video dose is just ignorant and narcissistic.
Consider the source!
Filmed live in a single wide!
This is why anger and quarter pounders don’t go well. Not fat shamin’, but dude, seriously. Chill the heck out. get a massage, take a day off and enjoy the outdoors and clear your mind. This kind of anger and buttrage never ends well.
This guy needs to move out of his mom’s basement. Also he is a asshat.
“Look at me, I have no friends, no money, no style and I hate every one and every thing which is more successful than me.”
This guy looks and sounds like your classic Android fanboy. So I’m deeming this video Not Fake.
Come on, and yet you won’t post my hysterical videos in relation to Android. That’s a pisser.
spam, spam, spam
Why would you post this video? Tasteless. Leander should reprimand the reporter and the editor who approved this.
He should consider joining the Republican race for the Presidency…. he’d fit right in.
Please take this down. I’m sick of seeing this poor loser on your front page.
says the fat diabetic from his armchair.
This guy should totally get the watch for the fitness tracker….and his demeanor and eloquence…..or lack there of…. totally fits the lo class ignorance that Greg Thurman mentioned in an earlier comment :/