These 5G supercuts will burn the word into your brain

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Apple isn't exactly subtle about pushing high-speed 5G networking. These 5G supercuts from the
Apple isn't exactly subtle about pushing 5G.
Photo: Apple

Apple execs uttered the term “5G” so many times during Tuesday’s iPhone 12 unveiling that they could have triggered semantic satiation. (That’s when you hear something so many times that it starts to sound … really weird.)

If their repetition of the word didn’t burn 5G into your brain — or turn your gray matter into mush — the 5G supercuts that followed certainly will.

The snarky, snippety compilation videos started popping up on YouTube and Twitter in the hours after Apple’s “Hi, Speed” event. If you missed the keynote, you deprived yourself of yet another tightly packed blitz of precision marketing.

Loaded with cinematic shots and enthusiastic hype for the 2020 iPhone lineup — Apple’s first smartphones with 5G — it was the tech world’s most impressive one-hour infomercial.

And if it delivered one message, aside from the usual “these are the best iPhones yet,” that message was this: 5G will change the world. Apple (and its partner, Verizon) basically carpet-bombed us with the term as they explained just how badly we all need the high-speed cellular networking that’s expanding around the world.

Just watch one of the 5G supercuts, and you’ll see:

Some joker even set a 5G supercut to music:

This is your brain on 5G supercuts

After watching one of those, I dare you to say “5G” and not feel like your brain got scrambled. (And no, we’re not 5G conspiracy theorists who think the next-gen cellular networks will cause COVID-19 or some other mystery disease.)

I’m not sure if “5G just got real,” as Verizon chief Hans Vestberg said during the streaming event. But I am fairly certain that if you listen to one of those supercuts, “5G” will start to sound pretty surreal.

Don’t say we didn’t warn you.