If you were just putting the finishing touches on that new fart app, Apple’s release of its App Store Review Guidelines might carry some bad news: “We have over 250,000 apps in the App Store. We don’t need any more Fart apps.” That is just one of the basic commandments handed down as the Cupertino, Calif. iPhone maker attempts to bring more transparency to the process of determining thumbs-up or thumbs-down on App Store entries.
Several other words of wisdom were found when Engadget republished the guidelines. Among the highlight: Apple wants to protect the kids – as well as it’s brand.
“We have lots of kids downloading lots of apps, and parental controls don’t work unless the parents set them up (many don’t). So know that we’re keeping an eye out for the kids.”
“We have lots of serious developers who don’t want their quality Apps to be surrounded by amateur hour.”
“If your app is rejected, we have a Review Board that you can appeal to. If you run to the press and trash us, it never helps.”
If your app passes the no-fart, no amateur, no crybaby rule, you must also pass a gauntlet of guidelines aimed at protecting Apple’s well-known iBrand.
Don’t mention that other smartphone. “Apps with metadata that mentions the name of any other mobile platform will be rejected.”
Don’t try to confuse users with that i-something app. “Apps which appear confusingly similar to an existing Apple product or advertising theme will be rejected.”
Apple also outlined some categories of apps it will flatly reject. Hint: you might want to re-think that spin-the-revolver strip-poker app.