Oh man, I love feeding pets, and they love it too. After your little friend has finally dragged you out of bed (by attacking your feet with sharp claws [cat] or nuzzling you with his disgusting wet nose [dog]), you both head to the kitchen together. He’s all around your ankles, excited for breakfast. And you? Totally up early – again! – and ready to make a delicious cup of coffee with plenty of time to enjoy it.
Now, though, there’s a new way to feed pooch or moggy: the Pintofeed. Here’s how the morning goes with a little iPhone-controlled automation:
Your loyal companion scratches at your closed door. You hear him and reach for your phone, irritated. You tap a button, and the Pintofeed in the kitchen dumps another load of dried meat pellets into its dusty bowl. Your pet goes to the kitchen, alone, and half an hour later you wake up, rush into your clothes and pick up a Starbucks on the way to work. Nice going, you lazy, selfish creep.
I imagine that the name Pintofeed comes from “pint of feed,” which is about as impersonal as human/pet relationships can get. It’s a motorized box with an air-sealed storage hopper that opens to deliver a dose of “feed” at the touch of a smartphone-app button. And should lifting a single finger for the animal you love prove too much, you can set up a schedule – from the same app – to feed the poor thing automatically.
I wonder what the next step is here? Maybe we could have nutrients piped into us and electrical pads to stimulate our muscles, whilst holograms of the outside world are piped into our visual cortexes via a big metal rod that spikes into the brain. You know, just like the Matrix – except that your dog hates you.
The Pintofeed is available now, for just $150.