11 Year-Old Boy Urinates On $36,000 Worth Of MacBooks

11 Year-Old Boy Urinates On $36,000 Worth Of MacBooks

This "urinating mischief child" was seen fleeing the scene of the crime clinging to the back of a mud flap.

We can all surmise that urinating upon your Mac will not be covered by your AppleCare, but here’s an interesting question: if you stand up right this second, unzip your fly and hose off all over your MacBook, can you even pay Apple to service the machines?

The answer is no, because Apple looks at micturated-upon MacBooks as a biohazard. Along with an obnoxious 11-year-old’s full bladder, the obscure fact above is what ended up costing a Pennsylvanian school district upwards of thirty-six thousand dollars to replace a cart full of thoroughly soaked MacBooks.

PennLive reports:

An 11-year-old boy urinated on several MacBook computers on a cart in the Upper Allen Elementary School Wednesday, damaging them beyond repair, according to Upper Allen Twp. police.

The loss came to more than $36,000, police said.

Police charged the boy with institutional vandalism and criminal mischief and are turning him over to the Cumberland County Juvenile Probation Department.

The reason it’s likely being calculated as a full loss is because Apple won’t service the MacBooks. Once urine is on a MacBook — whether animal or human — Apple considers it a biohazard. The more you know, huh?

It’s too bad he didn’t decide to whiz all over a cart of Windows laptops instead. His fellow students would have probably hoisted him on their shoulders and carried him out of the building, chanting his name and hailing him a hero.

[PennLive] ᔥ Macenstein

  • Jeff McCann

    He was just trying to reset the P-ram!

  • Jonathan Ober

    now I am pissed.

  • Dominique Griego

    How big is this kids bladder? Sheesh.

  • mr_bee

    “Hose off all over your macbook” ???? You are usually funny John, but this goes too far. Disgusting.

    Also a bit misogynist of you to assume you are only talking to guys.

  • mjoc

    hmmm…. urine is sterile.

  • Matthew Peterworth

    Bill Watterson never licensed Calvin and Hobbes for commercial merchandise, and he certainly never licensed Calvin urinating on anything. This is completely unauthorized and disrespectful to Watterson and the spirit of the comic/character.

  • Matthew Peterworth

    Think before you steal pictures off the internet, please.

  • Flyphoenix

    Well duh Apple won’t fix them who wants to fix computers that have been peed on?!

  • Steffen Jobbs

    People stranded in the desert drink their own urine and it doesn’t kill them. Writing off an entire inventory of Macs seems rather drastic. There must be some measures that could be taken to have them sterilized by putting them in some solution. They ought to take that kid and cut off his d**k to teach him a lesson.

  • Jonathan Ober

    Bill Watterson never licensed Calvin and Hobbes for commercial merchandise, and he certainly never licensed Calvin urinating on anything. This is completely unauthorized and disrespectful to Watterson and the spirit of the comic/character.

    While he never licensed Calvin…sad that he’s peeing on everything (although he can continue to pee on the Cowboys logo). It’s only Calvin’s likeness, not his exact look. It’s a shame since Calvin doesn’t stand for that kind of thing. But one would agree that it’s tough to copyright a likeness of a character and which characters aren’t influenced by others, etc.

  • SevanGrim

    this was almost a good article. Bit of informative humor. but then you had to toss that last paragraph in there. I bet if you re-read all of your articles and removed ONE paragraph every time, you would actually come across as a semi professional. maybe.

  • Lane Jasper

    So you just clean them off with some soapy water on a towel and say there was a leak in the ceiling above the cart. No big deal.

  • Simon Slawecki

    “It’s too bad he didn’t decide to whiz all over a cart of Windows laptops instead. His fellow students would have probably hoisted him on their shoulders and carried him out of the building, chanting his name and hailing him a hero.”

    Please, did you really have to add that? It’s because of people like you why people are getting ridiculed for owning a Mac.

  • send2mc

    As an IT specialist who works with (and owns) both MACs and PCs, I am very disapointed with your last paragraph. I really like the latest versions of both OSes. When a clients asks me if they should buy Windows or MAC, I really have to ask a few questions before I give an answer. But I always tell them that if you buy a MAC you’ll be fine but if you buy a PC, all MAC people will tell you how stupid you are… – I love MACs… Not too fussed with MAC people.

  • Twofeet

    Considering the majority of the world uses Windows OS for business and Linux OS for IT. The last paragraph is the reason most of the world hates Mac people. If Mac was viewed as being something other than a keyboard and screen with inflexable hardware for trendy people to take to Starbucks to pretend to write a novel. Then maybe the majority will see the tragic story of a kid destroying computers. Unfortunately to the rest of the world it reads “Kid pees on novelty toys worth a few hundred dollars”

  • Barney Wills

    hahaha, id like to give that kid a benjamin

  • Mark Davenport

    You know I doubt a Windows fansite would make a comment like that at the end about Macs, I guess it goes to show how desperate you’re at trying to ‘beat’ Windows.

  • cashgrey

    Well  feel too sorry for the boy, In my KG’s I urinated on piles of notebooks because my teacher locked 3 of us mischief makers in classroom. But Indian laws dont put kids for urinating.

  • Yannis Vatis

    Oh boy, kids these right? Not looking forward to this stuff now that the wife and I are talking children.

    Regarding the last paragraph, while I can see you added it as a joke it does come off as tacky. It’s being blown a little out of proportion and taken offensively by some, but it’s still unnecessary. Just a little feedback from a first time commenter.

  • Stinklington

    Maybe he pissed on the Macbooks because he prefers Windows notebooks. Just a thought.

About the author

John BrownleeJohn Brownlee is a Contributing Editor. He has also written for Wired, Playboy, Boing Boing, Popular Mechanics, VentureBeat, and Gizmodo. He lives in Boston with his wife and two parakeets. You can follow him here on Twitter.

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