Back in 2004, I couldn’t afford $499 for an iPod, so instead I got a 20GB Dell DJ for $299. Honestly, it wasn’t a bad little MP3 player, but it looked like it had been designed by some sort of extraordinary, irradiated orangutan toiling away in the bowels of the Kremlin during the Soviet electronics revolution of the late 1980s. I realize that analogy doesn’t make any sense, but just look at the design and button placement on this thing, and all will become clear.
My DJ lasted me quite a few years, but when I finally upgraded to an 80GB iPod Classic in 2006, I breathed a sigh of relief. The lesson? Accept no substitutes.
On that note, here’s the latest bizarre Communist clone of a popular Apple gadget: the Red Pad, named after the only book a loyal Maoist ever needed in the 1960s-era Chinese Communist Party, his Little Red Book. It looks just like an iPad, but it’s tailored specifically to run apps compatible with China’s massive state propaganda machine. Oh, and it costs twice as much as an iPad 2!
The only problem? After poor reviews, the Chinese government has wiped out all mention of its existence.
According to The Wall Street Journal, the Red Pad (红派壹号) was briefly heralded last month by a boasting state-run media. Cited as an iPad for the ideologically pure Communist, the Red Pad looked nearly identical to the iPad right to a 9.7-inch display, ARM-based dual-core processor, 16GB of Flash Storage, WiFI & 3G connectivity and dock of icons, but ran Google’s Android operating system instead of iOS.
What kind of apps shipped on the device?
A “daily political reference” app offers a channel to private, need-to-know-only People’s Daily updates on the political instructions of senior policymakers, according to the marketing materials. Reflecting the Party’s determination to put the public’s livelihood first, one app offers a way to gauge public sentiment streaming through cyberspace. The service costs an extra 3,800 yuan, according to the ads.
The only problem with the Red Pad? Shortly after being announced, the Chinese government started wiping all mentions of the device in stories and advertisement after the Chinese online community began giving it scathing reviews for both its steep price and its, well, crappiness.
In other words, even if a tablet is slathered in your ideology of choice, except no substitutes. There’s the iPad, and then there’s everything else.
