The future is here, folks, with a little gadgety box called a CH4 that you place near your rear end to measure the amount of gaseous emissions from your nether regions.
Pair that with an app on your iPhone that tracks the foods you eat and compares that with the amount you fart, and you’ve got one handy device for your office, car, or dorm room.
Now all it needs is to deliver a little electric shock each time you fart, and this thing would be perfect.