Leggo My iPhone: Open Letter to a Thief


@The Brooklyn Paper / Bess Adler
@The Brooklyn Paper / Bess Adler

Thieves looking to get their hands on iPhones have streamlined operations by snatching them while the owner is on the phone,  if recent police reports are anything to go by. (If it happens to you, try writing Steve Jobs — he may render justice when police can’t).

Simple but effective: it’s easier than snatching a bag and hoping there’s something good inside, right?

Chicago-based columnist Mark Bazer wrote an open letter to the person who snagged his wife’s month-old iPhone on a train:

Congratulations on your new iPhone! I just know you’re going to love it, as it’s a fantastic device with an easy-to-use interface and photos of my relatives. Heck, they’re now your relatives, too — we’re on the same family plan! That reminds me: It’s your turn this year to host Thanksgiving.

But back to your shiny new iPhone, because there are a number of things you should know to ensure it gives you so much enjoyment that you forget your shame.

For starters, it’s got plenty of room for music, but we weren’t sure what kind you liked. We were hoping Simon and Garfunkel , but if not, just sync that baby up to your PC and create your own mix. (If you don’t have a PC, they can be stolen from most homes.)

Also, we had the foresight to buy you the AppleCare protection plan, so your iPhone is covered for two years if anything goes wrong — with the exception of someone stealing it.

Funny, but it kinda makes me want to grab one, too.

Via Baltimore Sun