4/5 - page 2

I think Mad Skills Motocross 2 saved my life.

It’s not because it taught me a valuable lesson about not mixing chemicals or that someone shot me, and I had Mad Skills Motocross 2 in my pocket, and it stopped the bullet. And it didn’t swim out and rescue me when I went beyond my depth in the grown-up pool.

No, Mad Skills Motocross 2 saved my life by teaching me that I should never, ever, attempt to ride a motocross bike. Because I will die.

I’m not very good at this game, is what I’m saying. But it’s still pretty good.

I’m all about helping cute animals get home or get candy or whatever. Believe me, I am. But I’m also kind of a hypocrite because the most important word in that first sentence is “cute.” Give me a yeti or a little alien or whatever the hell Om Nom is in Cut the Rope, and I’ll give them whatever they want.

Show me something like the title characters in The Rainbowers, however … I mean, I’ll still do it. But I’ll look around first to see if any fuzzy bunnies need help gathering carrots or something.

But the game is fun, despite my terrible, terrible prejudice.

When I was a kid at Showbiz Pizza (back in those carefree days before that upstart rat staged his coup), the Dragon’s Lair cabinet always fascinated me. People would step up, watch a cartoon for about three seconds, and then they’d put another quarter in. They’d watch the same cartoon, and then they’d put another quarter in. And so it went until they said some words that my parents didn’t want me using and went off to play Dig Dug.

I didn’t understand what Dragon’s Lair was until much later; all I knew was that it looked like a movie and annoyed people.

This week, the iOS port of its 1991 sequel, Time Warp, made its way to the App Store, and it’s pretty much here to ruin your day and make you hate your fingers and your slow, stupid brain.

So basically, the old-school experience is intact, and I love it.

We have no shortage of endless running/flying/floating/swimming games in the App Store. And here’s another one.

Avoid: Sensory Overload is a techno-skinned endless game in which you guide a ship through a perpetual series of obstacles and traps. All the while, the thumping music and neon-infused background light show do their very best to distract you.

It’s flashy, annoying, challenging, and ultimately a lot of fun.

Jelly King ambitiously introduces himself as the king of all jellies…but that’s not quite true. Before he can take his rightful place as gelatinous royalty, he has to bounce his way through a harrowing adventure to collect diamond shards. No problem, right?

Jelly King is the kind of platformer that works well on mobile devices. In his excitement, the jelly you control is constantly bouncing. All you have to do is guide him left or right as you clear obstacles or pick up powerups. Jelly King bounces a certain distance each time you move, so the challenge is to anticipate future moves based off of where you start. If you’re too far away from the edge when Jelly jumps over a gap he might clear the first obstacle, but swiftly fall off the next.

Heroes went and got themselves in a big damn hurry.

It’s not enough anymore that they just get through the dungeon and fight the terrifying monster at the end. These days, they feel some strange need to do it all without stopping. It’s escalation, I guess; the new guys want to show off, so they run. Endlessly.

Dungeon Highway is the story of one such valiant champion who runs and shoots and dies a lot. And then you start over, and he runs and shoots and dies some more.

The History Channel has gotten a little weird over the past few years.

It used to be all about World War II and the Industrial Revolution, but ever since around 2008 or so, something has been creeping in. Something decidedly un-historic. Now, we flip over to History to learn about UFOs, prophecies, and pseudoscience. So it makes sense that the channel would release a fake documentary about a War of the Worlds-style conflict that took place instead of World War I.

The Great Martian War is an endless runner that shares its name with that program, and it places you in the middle of the conflict as a scout trying to deliver intel to Paris on foot. You’ll run, jump, and slide to avoid obstacles and massive alien walkers.

And you’ll die. You’ll die a lot.

Love is difficult sometimes.

You’ve seen it: the unrequited, the ill-matched, the people who just never should have met in the first place. People who are so much opposite that you wonder why they don’t just murder each other. Alright, that last one is a bit extreme. Actually, it isn’t. I know some people.

Anyway, Pyro Jump is about a flame who is in love with a paper doll, and he will overcome any obstacle, jump any gap, and avoid any spike that stands between him and his cherished one.

She’s not too into it for obvious reasons, but the game’s fun. When I don’t hate it.

I love developer Halfbrick’s endless runner Jetpack Joyride as much as anyone, but it always felt like it was missing something. And I never realized what it was until very recently. And then it hit me: baleen.

Baleen didn’t actually hit me; that would be gross. It’s all stringy.

Moby’s Revenge is a new endless title about a cute whale who escapes from an aquarium and has to avoid harpoons, mines, nets, and boats on his frantic and infinite swim toward freedom and wholesale slaughter of evil, Seaworld-running humans.

It sounds dark, but it isn’t.

If you’ve ever played an older role-playing game, you know the feeling of reaching a point at which you realize that your characters are too weak to progress, which means that you have to take them back to previous areas and kill boars or something to earn the experience to level up and become strong enough to actually continue playing the game.

Loot Hero is a game that is all about that moment. It’s an action-RPG, kinda, that has you running back and forth like a crazy person, killing monsters to gain experience so that you can continue running back and forth like a slightly stronger crazy person. And once you hit a wall, you have to go back to older levels with easier enemies so you can run back and forth there to gain experience and money to make your character better equipped to run back and forth among stronger enemies.

It sounds like a drag, and it kind of is, but it’s also surprisingly engaging.

Obsorb is hard.

It’s not that it’s complicated or the enemies move too quickly or even that its controls are tricky. But it’s one of those games where you’ve lost as soon as it starts, and all you can do is delay the inevitable.

In theory, if you were good enough at it, you could play it indefinitely. But that’s not going to happen because it’s impossible.

I’m a sucker for two kinds of mobile games: ones featuring improbably cute characters (preferably animals because they are more cuddly) and those that promise to scare the crap out of me.

In Fear I Trust, a new horror title by developer Black Wing Foundation, falls under the second category, but this first bit is just the first two chapters of a longer story, so we can’t really write off cuddly animals completely yet. But it’s the story of a person who has survived insane and amoral experiments at the hands of crazy Russian scientists, so I’m not going to hold my breath.

So far, it’s a dark and gloomy experience with more puzzles than frights, but it still has a lot going for it.

Recently, I was playing my favorite match-three game, and a thought occurred to me.

“This is all well and good,” I said to myself. “But it could really use a lot more punching.”

And then, because I am apparently some kind of wizard, I found Zez, an oddly-named puzzle title that has you clearing groups of three (or four) robots in order to propel a cat with a boxing glove farther into the sky so that he can inflict the maximum amount of damage to his opponent in the ring below when he comes crashing back down to Earth.

I had a fever dream once with a similar premise, but it wasn’t nearly as much fun.

We have no shortage of cute games about adorable characters who need your help to get home or something comparable, but here’s something a little different.

Kid Aviator is about a young carnival daredevil fired from a cannon who is trying to fly as high as he can to spite gravity. He has a cape. He has goggles. He is awesome.

The only problem is that the sky is full of all kinds of random crap that wants to ruin his affront to physics and Nature, and that’s where you come in.

Touchscreens and platformers just don’t mix most of the time. Lots of developers try to make platformers for mobile devices, of course, and will continue to as long as our collective nostalgia for Mega Man and Super Mario Bros. remains. UsagiMan is a creative spin on Mega Man-like platforming that compensates for less-responsive touch controls by sprinkling in a little web-slinging.

UsagiMan is a rabbit-shaped hero bounding through levels overflowing with high ledges and murderbots. Rather than ducking down to avoid enemy fire and carefully maneuvering over precarious platforms, UsagiMan flings himself across the screen via a Spider-Man-like grappling hook. Players can also attack enemies by furiously tapping them, which sends the hook out in rapid bursts.

Nobody likes to see a cute baby animal in danger. Sarah McLachlan has worked very hard to ensure that.

Lost Yeti is a cute game about an adorable baby yeti having a cuddly adventure. I never even knew an adventure could be cuddly, but this game taught me that it is not only possible, but preferable.

It’s also a smart, deceptively complicated puzzler that will keep you thinking, tapping, and swearing at those good-for-nothing monsters who pick on that poor little lost yeti for no reason other than that they are jerkfaces.

Barrels have been a staple of video games at least since Donkey Kong used them in his vain attempts to ward off a small, mustachioed man with a penchant for jumping.

What’s the deal with barrels? Is it that they’re easy to draw? Or fun to destroy? Or is it that their size and purpose provide a wealth of possibilities, their wooden or metal frames metaphors for the endless potential that lies within all of us, just waiting for someone to pry off the lid and share our special gifts with the world? Or something else less ridiculous?

Whatever the reason, barrels are awesome, and Tap & Blast, a fun aerial platformer of sorts out now for iOS devices, flipping loves them.

Let’s take a minute to address the fact that I’m not really sure how to pronounce the title of this game. Is it “B-ombs,” or is it, “Buh-buh-buh-bombs”? My money’s on the second one, and now that we’ve sorted that out, the review can begin.

‘Bombs’ with Too Many Letters is a puzzle-ish game that tasks you with clearing a ridiculous lab of the now-sentient explosives that are now buzzing around all willy-nilly. You do this with plain, stupid, regular bombs. You get three blast per level, and you can set up chain reactions to clear a bunch of what science hath wrought in one shot.

Meanwhile, this game is hilarious.

Crescent Moon Games has published a string of fantastic iOS games of late, including cute-as-pie Mimpi, deep RPG Ravensword: Shadowlands, first person shooter Neon Shadows, and the unforgettable Space Chicks. Each one approaches controls for touch screens in a unique and fairly successful way.

The publisher’s 2D side-scrolling action platformer Shadow Blade takes things even further, utilizing a complex but ultimately responsive control scheme. The game is made in Unity, giving it fluid, console-quality animations, a lush eastern-flavored soundtrack, and a gorgeous look and feel.

This is a fine effort from first-time iOS developer Dead Mage, for sure.

One of the first video games I ever finished was 1985’s Kung Fu, a port of a Japanese arcade game (Kung Fu Master)for the original Nintendo system. It was a side-scrolling beat ’em up about a guy fighting through five floors of a goon-filled building to rescue his girlfriend, and even though it’s probably not nearly as good as I remember, it’ll always have a special place in my nostalgia bank because I was so good at it back then.

Fightback is a new free-to-play fighter from developer Ninja Theory (makers of super-shiny console games like the PlayStation 3’s Heavenly Sword and the recent reboot of Devil May Cry), and it’s basically an updated version of Kung Fu. It even has the same 2D gameplay and girlfriend-rescuing premise and graphics and music that call back ridiculous action films from the ’80s.

So needless to say, I like this game a lot.

Episode One of developer Sunside’s six-part, hybrid adventure series is out now in the App Store, and it’s a promising start.

Abducted pulls from a variety of genres to build its sci-fi world and mechanics, including point-and-click (and text!) adventures, role-playing games, and even survival horror. It’s also a really good-looking game with an intriguing setting and enough mysteries to keep you moving on to see what’s next.

And if you have a device that can play it, you’ll enjoy it quite a lot.

Interactive zombie film series The Hunting is back with its third installment, which has you continuing to make life-threatening choices and furiously tapping on your screen to run and fight off crazed undead who want to put the nom on you.

It’s another creepy, high-tension experience that will quickly make you regret playing it with headphones and/or in the dark, both of which I did because I clearly don’t know what’s good for me.

But while the game is still completely scary and harrowing as ever, it fails to build on Part 2’s impressive shotgun blast of terror and what-the-hell-ery.

I went into Ark Saver expecting it to flounder about like the Noah’s Ark mini game in Bible Adventures on NES. I’m incredibly surprised that it is not only playable but pretty addictive.

The goal in Ark Saver is to match the next animal in a long line with its pair as quickly as you can. Each level gives you 30 seconds to pair 50 or more sets, and each level introduces more creatures to match. To get the highest score, you’ll need to maintain a combo streak that breaks every time you tap the wrong picture. Luckily, the only harm breaking a combo repeatedly has is decreasing your overall score.

Okay, so you’ve mastered Super Crate Box, and you’re so good at Super Hexagon that you can’t play it anymore without yawning. And maybe you’ve also bested a Sasquatch at arm-wrestling, and you’re the King of the Oompa-Loompas because those two things are just as likely.

But if you like those other games and are looking for something “inspired by” them, you’d do well to check out Atomic+, a recently released arcade/twitch/minimal title that puts you in the position of an electron that can leap between atomic orbits and has a lot of stuff flying at it constantly.

So maybe not quite like an actual electron, but you get my point.

I love games like Canabalt, even though a world of tricky endless runners flowed from that simple endless platformer’s success. Last Bunny takes the Canabalt style and introduces tilt controls along with jumping to give you more control over the fearless rabbit bounding over buildings.

You play as, well, the last adorable bunny in a world overrun by those grumpy stone blocks from Super Mario Bros. games and missiles. You jump from building to building trying to avoid bombs and pitfalls. Unlike Canabalt, you have control over the speed at which the bunny runs. By tilting your phone to the right or left, you can increase or decrease his movement to make jumping more precise. This is very helpful when blocks fall just outside the rabbit’s jump distance which will ultimately lead you to running into them unless you’re moving at a slower speed.