Apple Watch ad blitz shows off subtle superpowers

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Apple Watch ad Alice Cooper
This is so weird.
Photo: Apple

The Apple Watch maker has fired off a shotgun blast of new ads for its wearable device. The spots cover just about everything the smartwatch can do other than, you know, telling the time. And they even bring in a bit of star power to do it. Even cooler, all of the action takes place in minimal environments with colorful backgrounds. It’s like those cool iPod ads all over again.

Check them out below.

The Apple Watch’s first birthday is coming up in a couple weeks, so Cupertino likely made these ads to celebrate. But according to some reports, Apple’s smartwatch may be looking at a 25 percent drop in shipments in its second year, so a bunch of ads telling people what the thing can do may not be a bad idea to spark new interest.

Apple Watch ad: ‘Row’

Rowing may be good exercise, but it’s one of the most grueling things you can do. That’s why it’s a pretty great choice for this Apple Watch ad, which shows off how the device can encourage you to push it to the limit.

The woman decides — rightly so — that she’s had enough of her rowing machine, but her Apple Watch chimes in with a reminder that she’s hit the halfway point. And while we’d interpret that news as, “You know all of that horrible, tiring stuff you just did? All you have to do is that same shit, again,” it apparently works in this case.

Apple Watch ad: ‘Chase’

Running isn’t much fun, either, but it has a little more room for competition than stationary rowing, and that might appeal to some people. It works for Nick Jonas, apparently, as he uses third-party app Argus to outrun his brother Joe.

Apple Watch ad: ‘Find’

This ad, starring actress Chloë Sevigny, shows off one of the coolest features of the Apple Watch. Swiping up from your main screen provides you with a big button that will make your lost phone cry out for rescuing. I don’t think I ever misplaced my phone before I owned an Apple Watch, but now I do it all the time. It’s kind of eerie, really.

Apple Watch ad: ‘Swap’

The “Swap” Apple Watch ad is all about how quick and easy it is to change out bands and watch faces to suit your occasion. Because musician Jon Batiste knows that if Quincy Jones tells you tonight’s party isn’t going to be fancy, you should probably listen to him.

Apple Watch ad: ‘Golf’

“Golf” is probably the most uncanny spot in this batch of Apple Watch ads. We knew that scary musician Alice Cooper played some golf, but it’s weird seeing him doing it. And in those pants, no less. Plus, he’s hitting his Move goal while a low-key cover of Dire Straits’ “Walk of Life” plays, and it’s just too many levels, man.

Apple Watch ad: ‘Surprise’

“Surprise” is about how you can use your Apple Watch to control your compatible lights and appliances using the company’s HomeKit automation framework. The smartwatch is good for getting ready for surprise parties — and freaking out your friends who don’t know that you own amazing lights from the future.

Apple Watch ad: ‘Rain’

Finally, the “Rain” Apple Watch ad shows off another cool third-party app, Dark Sky. It can tell you with pretty much to-the-minute accuracy when it’s going to start and stop raining, and that’s just super-useful information to have.

Apple Watch ad: ‘Climb’

We’d just gotten over the rower and the running, but then Apple sprang stairs on us.

The “Climb” ad shows off the Workouts app’s ability to give you real-time heart rate readings. That feature lets you make sure at all times that you are sufficiently pushing it to the limit and becoming the best around. And maybe having numbers on how quickly your heart is beating means that you’re gonna fly now.

Edit, 2:35 p.m. — An earlier version of this story incorrectly identified Jon Batiste. We have updated the article and regret the error.