Star Wars fans love the series’ most dangerous tech


Star Wars Force Awakens Rey BB-8
This could be you, you heartless nerds.
Photo: Lucasfilm

A new poll of the most-wanted technology from the Star Wars universe shows that fans may not have really thought their answers through.

The survey comes courtesy of Harris Poll and software developer myDevices and asks one question: “If you could have any technology from the Star Wars trilogy, which would you want?”

While we approve of the study ignoring the prequels completely, we aren’t sure about the winners because it sounds like what these fans are really requesting are amazing and spectacular deaths.

The three most popular replies — hoverbikes (32 percent), lightsabers (31 percent), and landspeeders (26 percent) — would wreak havoc on society and the tech’s owners alike. Not that we really think that Luke’s ride from A New Hope and the speederbikes from Return of the Jedi are fundamentally any more or less dangerous than the cars and motorcycles we have now, but we have to factor in that the people operating them will likely do so while shouting “I’m Luke f***ing Skywalker!” to everyone they see. And that might bend a fender or two.

Also, those bikes have lasers mounted on them, and that’s maybe not the best idea for just cruising around town.

We aren’t sure even sure what people would plan to do with lightsabers, but odds are they’d end up chopping off a lot of their own and loved ones’ limbs. The good news in that case, though, is that the blade would instantly cauterize the wound, which means that they’d save a lot on the subsequent trip to the emergency room.

Three of the other winners are also weapons, although they place much lower on the list. Bounty hunter Boba Fett’s wrist rockets and the planet-destroying Galaxy Gun and Death Star take the bottom three slots with 14, 11, and nine percent of the vote, respectively. We can see the wrist rockets being kind of cool in theory, but are a combined 20 percent of Star Wars fans also James Bond villains? Why do they need humongous death rays?

If you ask us, though, droids would be our top picks, even though they only got 23 percent of the vote and came in fifth overall. Think about it, though: It would be like owning a puppy that doesn’t poop, you wouldn’t have to walk it, ever (although we’d still do it), and it can also fix your car. The savings alone would be tremendous, although that money would probably all go into buying a massive chair lift to get your robot friend up and down stairs.

Via: CNet