Oasis Star Declares: “iPhones Are For $%@!s”

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(Photo by Chrissy Polcino, used with thanks under Creative Commons license.)

So here’s former Oasis megastar Noel Gallagher, quoted in The Mirror this weekend:

I just want a basic 1994 Nokia mobile. I can keep it in my back pocket and just do the basics with it – phone and text. What would I need a camera on it for? iPhones are for Cockneys and ****s. And they are far too big.

It’s not clear to us exactly which insult The Mirror decided to blank out with asterisks, but feel free to use your imagination on that.

As for Cockneys – traditionally, they are Londoners born “within the sound of Bow Bells”; within earshot of the bells of St Mary-le-Bow church.

These days, however, the definition of Cockney is more flexible and you’ll find it used to describe all sorts of Londoners. Noel Gallagher, of course, is from Manchester, and considers all Londoners to be softies. Sorry, ****s.

Perhaps a little more surprising is the phone he says he wishes he had: “A 1994 Nokia mobile.” A phone indisputably larger than the iPhone.

Hmm, 1994? I think he means the Nokia 2110. Like this:

Nokia 2110, about as 1994 as it gets

Ah yes, something of a classic. Perhaps Noel’s got a point.