iPhone 5 Makes Other Smartphones Look Like Your Lard Ass Uncle [First Impressions]

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Everybody has been totally nerdgasming all over themselves this morning about the thinness of the iPhone 5.  It’s been kind of annoying to be honest, but then once you actually get to caress its skinny little body, you realize no one is overreacting.

The iPhone 5 has a serious eating disorder, and it’s freaking beautiful. The iPhone 5 isn’t supermodel thin, it’s subatomic thin. Like, this iPhone 5 is so crazy gaunt that I’m actually having a hard time texting on it, but I love it.