4 features the Apple Watch 2 doesn’t need

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Apple Watch 2 concept by Eric Huismann
The Apple Watch 2 may not look like this, but we'd be fine if it did.
Photo: Eric Heisuman

After the rumblings and grumblings that we’ll get our first look at the Apple Watch 2 in as soon as three months, the Internet is ablaze with all of the great features the update “should” have. But let’s not go overboard, here, because not all of these suggestions would make the new wearable better.

We aren’t talking about Android compatibility, complete independence from its paired phone, or a better battery life; we’d welcome any of those updates in a second. But we couldn’t really see a need or want for a few of the rumored/desired new features, regardless of how crazy awesome they might seem at first.

A FaceTime camera

Dick Tracy watch Apple Watch 2
Above: What some people think they want.
Photo: Tribune Media Services

This first update is probably the one most likely to actually show up in the Apple Watch 2, but we don’t really see the point. We suppose the idea is to finally turn the smartwatch into the ostensibly cool gadget from Dick Tracy (ask your parents), but do you know what they never addressed in that comic strip? How tired and sore Dick Tracy’s arm must have been all the time.

We think the current Apple Watch’s ability to remotely control the iPhone’s camera is pretty cool, but that doesn’t mean it needs one of its own. People don’t even like it when we voice-call them from our watches. They’ve said that directly. And we doubt it would be an epidemic or anything, a camera that small could help already creepy people creep more easily.

If Apple can think of an elegant way to incorporate a camera into the Apple Watch 2, we’ll give it a shot. But we can’t imagine having an entire video conversation into our wrists, especially considering all of the awkward contortions we already have to do just to use Apple Pay at a lot of places.

Round cases

Round Apple Watch
Don’t get us wrong; the Activity rings would look pretty awesome.
Photo: Oh NamKyung

We get it: The square cases on the Apple Watch are a bit surprising. But they make sense considering busy configurations like the Modular face and Apple’s recent focus on customizing your device with your own photos. That isn’t to say that those features are completely impossible with a round watch, but we like the square one specifically because it doesn’t look like other watches. Not that we’d mind if the Apple Watch 2 is thinner, of course, but the shape can stay.

A strap all full of blinky lights

Rumblings of a smart strap capable of delivering information via embedded LEDs (or something similar) began with a patent application last week which describes flexible displays built into the band itself. And that’s potentially cool, but Apple Watch bands are expensive enough as they are, and ground-breaking tech won’t help that cause at all.

Dynamo The Running Man
This idea also makes us think of Dynamo, the human Christmas tree from the 1987 film The Running Man.
Photo: TriStar Pictures

We’d be interested to see a more capable band, sure, but what if Apple found a way to build a battery into the thing to help out its buddy struggling up there in the case? Or what if it had additional sensors for more health diagnostics? That second application isn’t likely, however. Company head Tim Cook recently said that putting an Apple Watch through the FDA’s approval process would skewer the production schedule.

This doesn’t rule out a standalone Apple fitness band, however, which would be a more likely use for the embedded screen to keep the otherwise display-free device’s form factor Apple-smooth (its new iPhone battery case excepted).

3D Touch

The Apple Watch 2 doesn't need degrees of this.
The Apple Watch 2 doesn’t need degrees of this.
Photo: Apple

Maybe this one’s controversial, but we don’t see any point in expanding the current Apple Watch’s Force Touch function in the Apple Watch 2. The new iPhone 6s and 6s Plus feature 3D Touch, which can register three levels of contact (tap, kinda push, and totally push), while the Apple Watch can detect taps and pushes. And we think that’s just fine.

Despite some cool applications on the iPhone, we don’t see this feature being necessary on the Apple Watch 2 because smartwatches in general are intended for quick, discreet interactions. Adding granularity to a feature that was already pretty obscure and ambiguous when it launched doesn’t sound like the best idea ever, and neither does managing touch pressure and pop-up windows on a screen that small.

If Apple can make a case, though, we’d love to hear it.

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