Pyro Jump Will Make You Want To Slap Its Adorable Face [Review]

Pyro Jump

Love is difficult sometimes.

Pyro Jump by Pinpin Team
Category: iOS Games
Works With: iPhone, iPad, iPod Touch
Price: Free

You’ve seen it: the unrequited, the ill-matched, the people who just never should have met in the first place. People who are so much opposite that you wonder why they don’t just murder each other. Alright, that last one is a bit extreme. Actually, it isn’t. I know some people.

Anyway, Pyro Jump is about a flame who is in love with a paper doll, and he will overcome any obstacle, jump any gap, and avoid any spike that stands between him and his cherished one.

She’s not too into it for obvious reasons, but the game’s fun. When I don’t hate it.

Pyro Jump

Timing is pretty important.

Pyro Jump is a platformer that has you controlling Pyro, a cute little fire guy in pursuit of his ideal woman: Princess Paper. What that means for you is that you have to guide Pyro across the game’s many levels by tapping on your screen to tell him when to jump. He’s made of fire, so he sticks to everything because science has no place in cartoony platformers.

If you only care about getting to the end, you can. But teh hardcorez have two ways to test their skills. Each level includes time and collection goals to reward players who want to look for the most efficient route and collect all the tiny flames along the way.

It’s fun. When I don’t hate it.

And with those challenges just sitting there in front of you, why wouldn’t you try for them? Why shouldn’t it bother you when you miss your timing by a split second and don’t pick up one of those collectibles?

If it doesn’t, I envy you, but The Quest for the Perfect Run is a powerful draw, and once you start it, you realize how annoyingly picky Pyro Jump is. Gold-medal times require near perfection with little margin for error, and collecting every item means figuring the exact tiny angle at which Pyro must leap from rotating platforms.

Obviously challenges should be, you know, challenging, but it feels like a bit much, even for my obsessive-compulsive brain.

Pyro JumpGame Name: : Pyro Jump
The Good: Looks cute, controls well, and it’s very forgiving if you aren’t trying to complete absolutely everything.
The Bad: If you are trying to complete absolutely everything, it will ruin you.
The Verdict: It’s a cute, quick platformer that has plenty for casual players and obsessive types alike.
Buy from: App Store – Pyro Jump – Pinpin Team

Cult of Mac rating: 4/5

Related
  • markymac

    “It’s fun. When I don’t hate it.”

    Great pull-quote. That could’ve been the beginning and end of the entire review.

    I’m currently on Stage 1, level 8 and it’s maddening. I’m pretty sure I’ve restarted this level no less than 50 times trying to get the perfect run and I’ve yet to get beyond it. But I’m hooked and won’t be satisfied until I’ve Pokemon’d this level and every ensuing level.

    That’s if my sanity holds up.

  • CrazedLeper

    May I suggest adding a new section to the summary? Somewhere alongside, “good,” “bad,” and “verdict,” I’d like to see whether or not a game has “in-app purchases.” That’s all I need to know about any game and it could save me a click to have that information up front.

About the author

Evan KillhamEvan Killham lives in Nebraska and isn't interested in football, so he has plenty of time to play and think about video games. He has written for Bitmob and GamesBeat and sometimes, he even goes outside. But not too often because he's heard there are bees out there.

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