The Gentleman’s Guide To Using Your iPhone On A Date [Feature]

iPhone 5 fireplace

Don’t let your iPhone snuff out the embers of your love.

“I was only checking Twitter,” I exclaimed in shock, as she threw my iPhone across the room, shattering it against the brick wall.

“It’s either me, or the iPhone,” she emphatically declared.

I didn’t know what to say. I had only checked Tweetbot while she was looking at her menu. It had finally come to this. Now I had a broken iPhone and a pissed-off girlfriend on Valentine’s Day.

That little story may not have actually happened to me, but I certainly don’t want it to happen in the future. Like many of you, I’m kind of addicted to my iPhone. It can be a problem sometimes. But I have found a way to conquer my addiction and keep my girlfriend happy. No one wants to face the sadness and/or wrath of a loved one who feels neglected. Love is in the air this week with Valentine’s Day, and you want your romantic endeavors with your significant other to be as meaningful as possible. That’s why you need to use your iPhone like a gentleman.

“Just because you love your iPhone doesn’t mean you can’t love your partner too”

It’s important to remember that different girls have different levels of tolerance for smartphone use. You’ll often see a couple out together and both people have their heads buried in their phones. Then there are the couples who have decided to go straight Luddite and avoid technology at all costs when they’re together. Why can’t there be a happy medium? Just because you love your iPhone doesn’t mean you can’t love your partner too.

Now there are definitely circumstances when checking your iPhone is just not ok. A classy, romantic outing is different from a casual brunch. But every gentleman knows that a lady should be treated with respect no matter the situation. You should never be ignoring your date with your head in your iPhone. That’s just juvenile.

But if you must use your iPhone, here’s how to do it like a gentleman:

Check Your iPhone Together

Siri love

Consumer technology is usually meant to enrich our lives, so who’s to say an iPhone can’t make your date better? There’s the obvious use case for taking pictures, but there’s also much more an iPhone is good for.

Here’s an example. Say that you and your lady are trying to remember who plays the character of Zoe Barnes in House of Cards. Why not look it up in the IMDB app? You could use Siri as a resource as well. Got a question? Your iPhone can probably answer it; just don’t expect anything too profound — save that for the face-to-face chatting.

If you must check Twitter, at least pretend you’re finding something relevant to the conversation. The key is to make it contextual: you’re not checking your iPhone, you’re both checking it together.

Don’t Be Weird About It

There’s no need to be super secretive about your iPhone, either. Don’t act weird about it or she’ll think something is up. “Is he Snapchatting me?” You never want a thought like that to cross your date’s mind.

Show Her That She Doesn’t Need to Compete For Your Attention

“Most women would rather have all of you for a little while than only half of you all the time”

The smallest gestures of affection will usually mean the world to your date. If you’re pretty attached to your iPhone normally, showing her that she’s more important will go a long way.

When you get an email notification during a date, don’t even glance at your iPhone. Pretend like it never happened and keep your gaze on that beautiful female sitting in front of you. The email will be waiting for you later, but she might not be.

Only use your iPhone for checking Twitter, email, texts, etc. when the date is on pause. The moment she returns to your presence, set the iPhone down and show her that she has your undivided attention. If you need to shoot off a text, excuse yourself to the bathroom. Most women would rather have all of you for a little while than only half of you all the time.

It’s a good rule of thumb to keep your iPhone in a pocket or bag most of the time. That way it won’t be a third wheel.

When Self Control Fails, “Do Not Disturb”

Do Not Disturb

Use it.

If you absolutely can’t control your urge to check your iPhone, then the Do Not Disturb feature in iOS is your best friend. Open the Settings app and toggle it on. You won’t see or feel any incoming notifications until you disable it, and your significant other won’t be the wiser.

Jailbreakers can use a handy tweak that dismisses an incoming call when you set the iPhone face down on a surface. Shaking the iPhone will turn off the ringer and vibrator.

Now put your iPhone away and enjoy time with your partner.

  • dhl

    TL:DR version – keep it in your pants, dummy!

  • antonywu

    More like if she actually threw it across the restaurant and shattered the device… time to find a new valentine.

  • Bob Smogango

    Best thing on a date is to turn your phone’s ringer OFF. If you are with a girlfriend or a data and this person and you have not discussed phone etiquette, then you need to not be obsessed with your phone. Most calls are NOT emergencies, unless you are a doctor or some other position that deals with emergencies on a routine basis that’s on call.

  • joewaylo

    If I’m on a date, I’d leave the phone in the glove box. No way in hell would I take it along to ruin the date. That’s where Tim Taylor failed on his date with his wife. Listening to NFL with his headset covering one ear.

  • cfunk

    Put your phone away when you’re on a date, nerd.

About the author

Alex HeathAlex Heath is a senior writer at Cult of Mac and co-host of the CultCast. He has been quoted by the likes of the BBC, KRON 4 News, and books like "ICONIC: A Photographic Tribute to Apple Innovation." If you want to pitch a story, share a tip, or just get in touch, additional contact information is available on his personal site. Twitter always works too.

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